I watch: Rockstar Inxs Week 2 Episode 5

Da Music Issue

For all INXS ROCKSTAR REVIEWS. Go Inxs index

I am addicted to Rockstar: Inxs. I promise you.

Will: eliminated last week. Thank god! His cheap “sleep with me” eyes that he focused on the three woman in the front row was starting to feel like that one guy in a bar who really didn’t get the hint. I was begging him to stop stomping, followed by shaking his hips. Shiver.

Ty: I just don’t get him. I hate his Mohawk. He feels like a cheesy happy ken doll except he’s black and has a Mohawk. I hate to say this, but did he get picked because they needed at least one minority in the show? I know he’s not good when I start willing myself to like him because he’s the only minority on the show.

Tara: She freaks me out. Honestly. She seems hell bent on showing the world her couchie. Opening her legs up, unbuttoned front button and standing on the edge of the stage. No! No! No! I don’t want to see that. She screams too much. I hid under the cushion and begged people to kick her out. I can’t stand another week of hearing her because I am too lazy to get off the sofa.

Suzie: She nearly got eliminated twice last week. This week she rocked… what was the song she did? Roxanne. Oh, my. I had my jaw dropped open. She has an amazing voice. I think everyone will have to watch out for her.

Neal: He admitted he doesn’t know what “melodic” means, which is bad because that’s what he was asked to do. He didn’t pull it off, and when asked if he thought he pulled it off he said, “Totally, I made it rockin’ didn’t i?” proving he wasn’t joking when he said he didn’t know what the word meant. Inxs was not impressed. Good jeans, good legs, pretty good body but dumb.. not going to go with this band.

Mig: Mig is good. He’s really hardworking and gets the job done. You can see him being a rock opera singer. Good at job. I thought while watching the show, “I would like to see what happens to him. He could really be good.” And then one of the Inxs guys said, “I don't think we have seen the best of you yet.” Touche. He is in my top 3.

Marty: reminds me of David Spade. I love David Spade. But I don’t remember him the minute he leaves the screen.

Jordis: Didn’t know why Inxs loved her so much until tonight when I sat down and watched her sing.  She’s amazing, confident, not trying too hard, and just sings like she should as in perfect. Great eye shadow as well. I say forget Inxs. Someone just give her a solo record deal. She rocks. Everyone knows it and the band does too, “Big hair, Big Belt Buckle, Big Voice, Big Future.” If I was the kind of person who voted in these things, she would be the person I vote for this week.

Jessica: The first time I saw her, I just couldn’t understand why she could look so unattractive when she’s obviously very attractive. Maybe because all she does is show of her perfect tummy in her tight black bikinis and low cut jeans. I spend her whole set wondering if I too can achieve such perfection and how each performance seems like a replay of the last. Turned out I wasn’t the only person who thought it either.

JD: I keep thinking he fits with the band well. I like his style and shocked by his willingness to be an asshole. “While the others are learning Inxs songs, I know them because I love them,” and says this to the band and in front of his competitors, admittedly, I think its true and the band might know it as well. But JD is stupid. The others are going to make his life so miserable that he’s going to go nuts, blow up and then don’t sing well. There is so much wrong about him (Why did he keep his one hand up in a peace sign all song??) but somehow I keep wanting him to pass.

Heather: I want to like heather because I like Dave Navrraro likes her tattoos. (And he’s not half a stupid as I thought. He is compelling to watch and is like pure rockstar….he encapsulate Jane’s Addiction as well as the Chilly Peppers. Anyway, yeah this also encapsulates what I feel about heather, she just skips my mind quickly and I focus on something else.

Deanna: I liked that REM song. She kept dissing it. She pissed Inxs off for dissing it as they said, “REM is our friend,” oops. She’s just trying way to hard to be a “Rock Star” She doesn’t care about the music or the songs. She seems like a nice person, but she’s “not doing it for me,” and “I am not feeling it.” This show is going to do to these two phrases what ANTM did for “Edgy,” and “high fashion.”

Daphna: Nice earrings, scarf and I so love the flower by hair. I want a black cloth flower to pin to my head under a scarf and green eye shadow. I want that much capacity for style to get away with it like she does.. but the more important question is What would Joan Jett do? She could cry if she heard this rendition of her “I can’t stop myself from loving you.” Who does Daphna love? She doesn’t know it either. Too bad they only get rid of one person a week. I can think of a few people who need to go soon.

Brandon: Heeee..seeeeems…slllow. He seems like a good person. He seems really American. I think he might be an okay singer and a good guitar player. But he’s like a Dave Mathew’s Type band lead singer. He is not going to be the singer of Inxs. I will bet JD is right, he’s learning Inxs songs as we speak.

The horror of horrors. I think they auditioned like 15,000 people in 20 cities around the world and they came out with these 15? Five of them are already on their way of not making it. Shouldn’t these people be really really good? They are really going to be the real lead singer of INXS... (for one album and one tour anyway)

Tomorrow I find who gets kicked out.

Anyway, if you want to see the singers, hear them sing, read about the show the link is

http://www.cbs.com/primetime/rock_star/

So I am a fan of cheesy rock bands and cheesy rock talent shows. Deal with it. If you sat down and watched it, you migth realize it's really good. That is if you know the songs they sing.... (Never noticed how fast and how many words "Walk This Way," have before, although I do like it.)

For all INXS ROCKSTAR REVIEWS. Go Inxs index

For all INXS ROCKSTAR REVIEWS. Go to Da Music Issue